Tim Walker from the comments section asks: How can you mend a broken heart?

Hi Tim. Some may say time or rebounding like Dennis Rodman is the best way to mend a broken heart, but really, the best way is a procedure called an angioplasty.

First, make an incision in one of your major arteries. Then begin to feed the catheter into the artery (important note-put the catheter in where you made the incision, not where nurses usually try to shove it). Once you’ve located the blockage feed a second catheter. Use the second catheter to inflate a small balloon in order to open up the blockage.

Depending on how badly your heart needed mending you may need to consider putting a stent into place to aide in the healing.  If you don’t have any stents lying around, you should be able to quickly fashion one out of Reynolds Wrap and a hair barrette.

After the procedure remember to get plenty of rest and go to physical therapy, who knows, maybe you’ll meet someone new there.

Donnie from email asks:
One of my coworkers brought in some excess vegetables from her garden the other day. I took home a few tomatoes and used them in a salsa. The next day when I thanked her for the tomatoes she talked to me about million different ways to garden.  And then explained how Monsanto controls our seeds and we need to try and branch off from genetically modified foods and need to get back to growing our own food, from real natural seeds.  She scolded me because I told her I used to have tomato cages in my backyard and she says that I’m cruel and I should only be raising cage-free, farm fresh produce. I just like home made salsa I’m not into like changing the world what should I do?

Hi Donnie. Tell your coworker that, for a vegan, she sure spews a lot of bologna. Next time she starts talking about this nonsense just nod along, then, as she walks away mutter to the others gathered around ‘she may not drink store bought milk, but she is a real horse’s dairy-air.’ Then sit back and lap up the laughs.