Less than a week after news broke over the impending divorce of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, an important story to the entire nation that’s been able to cut through the white noise of other insignificant news topics such as police shootings, terrorist attacks, election updates, bank scandals, KY Supreme Court rulings, protesters in the streets and other hodgepodge, our sources now say that the cause of the separation was Jolie’s obsession with another pit…CentrePointe Pit.

Local citizens have reported multiple sightings of the longtime, Hollywood actress and pit several times over the last few months but while there appeared to be no relationship developing, insiders close to Jolie say she’s been wearing a vial filled with CentrePointe’s dirt around her neck since June and has made plans to introduce the pit to Jon Voight early next week. “The two of them have become real close ever since she heard about the future plans for CentrePointe (see also ‘CentrePointe To Become World’s Largest Horsegrave‘),” said TMZ photographer Joey Black. “If the rumors are true, everyone fully expects her to reprise her role as the Tomb Raider, for sure.”

Jolie has also introduced her children to the new, younger pit already but the meeting was done in 60 seconds after her one girl, interrupted some of the construction workers pretending to work. A second meeting has been scheduled but many legal experts are reporting that the Pitt-Jolie children’s adoption will be voided by the divorce, meaning they’ll all have to return to the country they came from.

While some news outlets are reporting that Jolie was fed up with her husband’s drug use and alleged affairs, we’ve learned the final straw, prompting Jolie to file the divorce papers, came last week when she finally discovered Brad Pitt had been Edward Norton all along.