Ongoing construction at CentrePointe may have created a rift in the space-time continuum and opened a gateway to what some are referring to as ‘the upside down.’ Webb Company architect and amateur astrophysicist Bernard Thurman held a press conference Tuesday in which he assured reporters that there was no need to panic.

“It’s just another Lexington,” Thurman said. “Subtly different from our own. For instance, in that version of Lexington, they actually finished CentrePointe fifteen years ago.”

However, some believe there are more sinister ramifications at play.

“It doesn’t take this long to build part of a parking garage, there’s something else going on here,” skeptic Wionna Hopper told us. “They’ve got it all fenced off and stuff, but one time, I followed a car down there. Based on what I saw there is a portal to the upside down down there.”

The fact that there is a secret portal to another world is just the tip of the iceberg, Hopper explained, “I know people say I watch too many law commercials but, I’ve seen some things. I believe they are keeping Darryl Isaacs down there, brutally training his mind to be able to move and control things. They’re preparing him to go into the upside down.”

Why are they doing this? Hopper has a fairly believable answer, “because, when they first opened the portal, Gary Becker was taken off of the diving board outside his friend’s house and into the upside down. And no one even seems to care, Kevin Renfro just showed up in the commercials and everyone moved on, but he’s stuck down there and Isaacs is being trained to go in and find him.”

If Becker is indeed in the upside down it seems he may be in some danger. “There is a monster that lives in the upside down, terrorizing and killing. The monster is called the Demomorganandmorgan and if we’re not careful and Isaacs is unsuccessful, not only is Gary Becker a goner, but the monster could come through the portal, and it would come… for the people.”

As of press time the 3 offices intend to settle outside of the upside down. The lawyers did send a joint response to our request for comment, it read: “Suffering from nose bleeds? Sudden cravings for waffles? You may be suffering from telekinesis, please call our offices.”