Over the summer Fayette County Public Schools built a new addition, an $82 million dollar addition, and as the first day of school is right around the corner, they need to decide quickly on whether to Love It Or List It. While the school system is prepared to pay for the new school out of pocket (after what must have been a bigger than usual lottery season) some taxpayers are hoping the school district will listen to all financial offers before permanently settling on naming the school after Frederick Douglass.

“Here at Kroger we’re all about expanding our brand, and this high school is located in an area of town where we have no stores. The new location is almost 3 miles away from our nearest store, and we don’t want forgetting about us as a grocery option,” explained night shift supervisor Tim Kroger.

He added, “I tell our employees that we’re not in the grocery business, we’re in the people business.  Which is why we want our name out there on Stadiums, or schools, or buildings, anything really. However, we’re happy to offer new parents a small sum of money to name their child.”

“They’re out here doing what’s best for our community,” explained loyal shopper Clicklist Jackson, “I think the school district should take this money and put it back into improving the other schools.”

Jackson continued, “Look, what’s a better name for a high school? An abolitionist, social reformer, preacher, and a soldier in the fight for suffrage or the future employer of many of these students? We need the resources to pump out USDA Prime Choice Grade A students, and I need the fuel points.”