Since the dawn of time, finding science in Winchester has been a difficult task and the world has been thankful that there was at least one scientific discovery in this city that time forgot. As ginger-soda scientists or fizzicists as they are more commonly known, once discovered something magically delicious by merging their “city” water and a sweet sugary syrup. However, for the last 92 years fizzicists have been hoping that liquid lightning would strike Clark County twice, in a place that otherwise only produces beer cheese and Lees.

Using carbonation dating scientists have been able to estimate Ale-One existed around 600 million years ago, and since then little advances have been made in the ginger-based soda sciences. That is until someone remembered that cherry sodas are good.

The discovery can be attributed to Winchester resident and former New Clear Fizzicist Professor at the nearby private research university MIT (Mount Sterling Institute Of Tonics) Hans Bethe Jr. We had a moment with the second most famous doctor in soda, and he explained that recently Ale-8 has started implementing research practices that allow scientists to add 2 or 3 additional ingredients to their soda reactor, in hopes of finally creating a delicious ginger-ale that tastes just as good out of a can as it does a bottle.

Bethe reminds us the importance of never giving up on your dreams, “Remember a couple years ago on Facebook, when everyone fu-beep-ing loved science? Well, thankfully science didn’t stop sciencing because being a nerd stopped being cool. It kept moving forward, trying to find new solutions to old problems.”

Cherry Ale-8 may not be the final answer we’ve all been looking for, but it’s a step in the right direction. That direction being an awesome new drink to pour bourbon into.