Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the town
The former Vice Mayor was nowhere to be found.
The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes North Lime Donuts soon would be there.

The WKYT newsteam was all snug in their beds,
While visions of natural disasters danced in their heads.
Barbara Bailey in her ‘kerchief, and Chris in his cap,
The team settled in for their long winter’s nap.

When out in triangle park there arose such a clatter,
The news team sprung up to see what was the matter.
Down to the skating rink they flew like a flash,
Stopping just briefly so Officer Don could report on a crash.

When they arrived, they found a red sleigh
And a man delivering presents, that man was Jim Gray.
He snapped his two fingers and what should appear?
But Vice Mayor Steve Kay, leading eight tiny reindeer.

Gray sprang to his sleigh, and he spoke up himself
“I must hand out these gifts and clean up the commonwealth.”
The next thing that happened gave Officer Don quite a thrill
Jim Gray’s sleigh took off like a chopper and headed north to Louisville.

“Now, Katina! Now, Carly! All you dancers and vixens
Leave Minardi hall, there’ll soon be an NCAA conviction.”
Jim Gray next headed off to Eastern Kentucky
To grab a lump of coal for some politician unlucky.

He dropped off a four star recruit at the home of Mark Stoops
And a book on how to keep kids from transferring for UK Women’s Hoops
An out of court settlement was wrapped up for Morgan and Morgan
Immanuel Baptist Church was gifted a brand new pipe organ.

The last stop he made was to the Governor’s home.
There he found cookies and his favorite chai latte with foam.
When he knelt down to place his gift under the tree,
He found a box waiting and called out “this one’s to me!”

He unwrapped the gift and opened the box
And the look on his face was quite unorthodox
A tear came to his eye as he realized with cheer
He and the governor got the same gift for each other that year.

Gray went to his sleigh, and gave his reindeer a whistle
They galloped and the sleigh took off like a missile
He looked down and called out as his red sleigh took flight
“Merry Christmas to all, and to all a goodnight!”